APA Top Ten: alternatives to seeing Street Fighter: the Legend of Chun-Li

Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li surprised me. It's actually much worse than 1994's Street Fighter film. Despite its ridiculous plot and hammy acting, Steven E. de Souza's 1994 take on Street Fighter was amusingly campy, with laughably atrocious dialogue and colorful characters. While de Souza's film was memorably mediocre, Andrzej Bartkowiak's (Romeo Must Die, Cradle 2 the Grave) theatrical reboot of Capcom's fabled franchise, chronicling Chun Li's origins prior to the Street Fighter tournament, is unforgettably bad.

The plot follows the quest of Chun Li (Kristin Kreuk) as she tracks down her father several years after he was kidnapped by evil businessman M. Bison (Neil McDonough). She ventures to Bangkok to bring him down, with the help of the mysterious Gen (Robin Shou), Interpol agent Charlie Nash (Chris Klein), and detective Maya Sunee (Moon Bloodgood). A very simple premise, yet everything is still poorly executed: poor editing, terrible dialogue, stale martial arts movie clichés, and a plot that barely has any semblance to the series' mythos. Highlights include an awkward clubbing scene where Chun-Li seduces a lesbian and an out-of-place ritual scene where Bison sacrifices a pregnant woman to acquire demonic powers.  

Kreuk's performance is emotionally flat and her ongoing narration annoyingly states the obvious. After seeing Michael Clark Duncan regulated to a thug in yet another movie, this time as Bison's right hand enforcer Balrog, I silently weep for how far his star has fallen. Shou adds yet fighting game movie adaptation to his resume: he played Liu Kang in the two Mortal Kombat films, and he was the Pirate Leader in Dead or Alive (he was slated to play the franchise's iconic ninja character Ryu, but choreographer Corey Yuen refused). The film's worst performance belongs to Klein, who deserves a Razzie for his comically atrocious performance as Nash.

Now that it's widely agreed that this film is worse than Jean-Claude Van Damme's Street Fighter, the only worthwhile debate remaining is which will be the worse theatrical adaptation this season, Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li or the upcoming live action Dragon Ball movie. Instead of beating a dead horse for the rest of this article (Capcom surely doesn't care), here's a list of things I wish I had distracted myself with instead of seeing Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li.

10. Korean Street Fighter TV Show

There's no better indication of a franchise's success than an unauthorized, low budget television spin off.

9. Street Fighter cartoon

It was common in the early 1990s for popular video game franchises (Mario, Zelda, Mega Man) to inspire poorly made Saturday morning cartoon spin-offs. Street Fighter II was no exception. File this one under the "it's so bad, it's funny" category.

8. Future Cops

This not-so-subtle theatrical tribute/rip-off emerged during the peak of Street Fighter mania in 1993, preceding the official American Street Fighter film by a year. Like many Hong Kong action-comedies of the time, it has an absurdly over-the-top plot and really bad special effects. It's also notable for having an all-star cast, including "heavenly kings" Andy Lau, Jackie Cheung, and Aaron Kwok.

7. Street Fighter

Critically panned back in the day, this Jean-Claude Van Damme vehicle has aged surprisingly well and has become something of a cult-camp favorite. Although it featured a talented cast including Ming Na Wen (Joy Luck Club), Wes Studi (The Last of the Mohicans), and the late, great Raul Julia (Addam's Family), nothing could save the film from its laughably poor plot and embarrassing scripting. Seeing a younger Kylie Minogue play Cammy in tight camos is always plus, though...

6. City Hunter

This live action adaptation of the classic City Hunter manga devoted an entire fight scene where Jackie Chan and Co. literally become Street Fighter characters, even going as far as using sound effects from the game. I'm sad to say that Jackie Chan's take on Chun-Li is still the most accurate live action representation of the long-legged icon.

5. Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie

Easily the best and most faithful Street Fighter movie, it's probably best remembered for shamelessly pandering to fanboys with a gratuitous Chun-Li shower scene. It also inspired a Street Fighter Alpha anime series, one that's thankfully much better than the American cartoon.

4. Street Fighter The Later Years

College Humor's hilariously satirical live action series takes a glimpse into the not-so glamorous lives of the World Warriors following the tournament. The series became an instant success with a possible TV series in the works.

3. Street Fighter III tournaments

While Street Fighter III didn't come close to reaching its predecessor's popularity, the game is a permanent fixture at competitive gaming tournaments throughout the country thanks to its deep game-play mechanics. Daigo Umehara's dramatic and improbable comeback against Justin Wong is arguably the most famous bout captured on video; Umehara's split second parries against Wong's lightning-fast Chun-Li super special quickly became the stuff of internet legend.

2. Super Street Fighter II Turbo HD Remix

Arcades are all but dead in America, but the competitive spirit of Street Fighter II lives on in Udon Comic and Backbone Entertainment's high definition remake, available on the PlayStation Network and Xbox Live Arcade. Not only does it feature redrawn high definition sprites, remixed music, and rebalanced game play, but gamers can now play anybody anytime anywhere in the world with the game's online modes. Purists that object to Udon's updated illustrations and Backbone's game play tweaks can switch back to the game's classic mode.

1. Street Fighter IV

Street Fighter is officially back and better than ever. Accessible to fans that stopped playing after Street Fighter II, but deep enough to satisfy most Street Fighter III veterans, this much anticipated sequel doesn't disappoint. The recently released home console versions (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, and PC) add more characters from Street Fighter Alpha and online play. Street Fighter IV single-handedly makes the fighting game genre relevant again.